Comments for The Loyalty Group http://theloyaltygroup.com Talent Management Consultants Mon, 15 Mar 2010 12:09:51 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Comment on Explaining Competencies in Simple Language by irem http://theloyaltygroup.com/2006/08/03/explaining-competencies-in-simple-language/#comment-46 irem Mon, 15 Mar 2010 12:09:51 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2006/08/03/explaining-competencies-in-simple-language/#comment-46 Hi,<br /><br />I really liked your article. It is a rare collection of "how to comminicate competencies" to a wide range of professionals.<br /><br />In my current company we have a new competency framework which will be used in performance management. Nowadays we are preparing a training program to make sure that a wide range of (~4000) people in the company understand the new framework.<br /><br />I would love to hear if there are any other reources (books, articles, etc.) you would recommend. We are especially interested in resources with learning execises and detailed insights on how to explain competencies.<br /><br />Thanks a lot! Hi,

I really liked your article. It is a rare collection of "how to comminicate competencies" to a wide range of professionals.

In my current company we have a new competency framework which will be used in performance management. Nowadays we are preparing a training program to make sure that a wide range of (~4000) people in the company understand the new framework.

I would love to hear if there are any other reources (books, articles, etc.) you would recommend. We are especially interested in resources with learning execises and detailed insights on how to explain competencies.

Thanks a lot!

]]> Comment on Is it OK to Cry at Work? by Anonymous http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/04/26/is-it-ok-to-cry-at-work/#comment-45 Anonymous Sat, 23 Jan 2010 15:28:04 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/04/26/is-it-ok-to-cry-at-work/#comment-45 Rather cool blog you've got here. Thanx for it. I like such topics and everything that is connected to them. BTW, why don't you change design :). Rather cool blog you've got here. Thanx for it. I like such topics and everything that is connected to them. BTW, why don't you change design :) .

]]> Comment on Why “Talking” is the Latest Management Trend by Carole http://theloyaltygroup.com/2009/06/30/why-talking-is-the-latest-management-trend/#comment-44 Carole Wed, 01 Jul 2009 20:59:05 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2009/06/30/why-talking-is-the-latest-management-trend/#comment-44 I couldn't agree more. I would add that relying too much on technology to communicate (versus real-time, in-person and on-the-phone discussion) also erodes trust - a commodity in short supply these days. Stifles innovation as well.<br />Carole I couldn't agree more. I would add that relying too much on technology to communicate (versus real-time, in-person and on-the-phone discussion) also erodes trust – a commodity in short supply these days. Stifles innovation as well.
Carole

]]> Comment on Is it OK to Cry at Work? by Anonymous http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/04/26/is-it-ok-to-cry-at-work/#comment-43 Anonymous Fri, 12 Jun 2009 21:40:42 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/04/26/is-it-ok-to-cry-at-work/#comment-43 I was just laid off of work. The whole plant closed down so I wasn't singled out. But when people at the other plant asked why I wasn't relocated to that plant my former boss said that I made too much money and I cried too much. Now I worked for them for 17 years and I cried on the job twice. And it was over 10 years ago. But that is what stuck in his head. I would say that no- it is never OK for a woman to cry on the job. I was just laid off of work. The whole plant closed down so I wasn't singled out. But when people at the other plant asked why I wasn't relocated to that plant my former boss said that I made too much money and I cried too much. Now I worked for them for 17 years and I cried on the job twice. And it was over 10 years ago. But that is what stuck in his head. I would say that no- it is never OK for a woman to cry on the job.

]]> Comment on Toxic People by Jenna http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-42 Jenna Tue, 02 Jun 2009 19:51:13 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-42 Thanks for the great advice! I'm currently dealing with a toxic brother-in-law who surprisingly fits EVERY type of person mentioned in your article rolled into one. He's incredibly negative, gossips about everyone, is paranoid about others speaking about him, and dredges up offenses from 20 years ago. He's jealous, manipulative, a liar and just plain...stupid. It's absolute torture being with this person and I was the recipient of one of his rantings this week. I plan to take your advice to heart! Thank you! Thanks for the great advice! I’m currently dealing with a toxic brother-in-law who surprisingly fits EVERY type of person mentioned in your article rolled into one. He’s incredibly negative, gossips about everyone, is paranoid about others speaking about him, and dredges up offenses from 20 years ago. He’s jealous, manipulative, a liar and just plain…stupid. It’s absolute torture being with this person and I was the recipient of one of his rantings this week. I plan to take your advice to heart! Thank you!

]]> Comment on Toxic People by Anonymous http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-41 Anonymous Tue, 02 Jun 2009 08:30:59 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-41 Something I've learned in dealing with toxic people is to not partake in activities that are considered toxic. Gossip is probably one of the worst workplace offenses. If you gossip about another person's toxicity you're no better than them. The safest thing to do is not give in to gossip, even if it's initiated by someone else. While it does help to confide in someone about your problems, it will only make things worse for everbody at the workplace if not a single soul can be trusted. And "loose lips sinks ships:" Friendships deteriorate when gossip is prevalent because gossip deteriorates trust.<br /><br />But I do have a couple questions - <br /><br />Are there certain workplaces that would have a lower risk of having to deal with toxic people?<br /><br />Also, what's a good way to read people's motives? It's hard for me to tell who is toxic because I always try to be accepting towards everyone I meet. What's the best way to tell whether criticism comes from an ugly place or comes from good intentions? Something I’ve learned in dealing with toxic people is to not partake in activities that are considered toxic. Gossip is probably one of the worst workplace offenses. If you gossip about another person’s toxicity you’re no better than them. The safest thing to do is not give in to gossip, even if it’s initiated by someone else. While it does help to confide in someone about your problems, it will only make things worse for everbody at the workplace if not a single soul can be trusted. And “loose lips sinks ships:” Friendships deteriorate when gossip is prevalent because gossip deteriorates trust.

But I do have a couple questions –

Are there certain workplaces that would have a lower risk of having to deal with toxic people?

Also, what’s a good way to read people’s motives? It’s hard for me to tell who is toxic because I always try to be accepting towards everyone I meet. What’s the best way to tell whether criticism comes from an ugly place or comes from good intentions?

]]> Comment on Toxic People by Phyllis Roteman http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-40 Phyllis Roteman Wed, 21 Jan 2009 16:34:00 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-40 Ready to win, I'm so happy that this writing helped. Sometimes just seeing the craziness (of a toxic environment or toxic behavior) for what it is makes it easier to deal with. I know when I was sucked into a toxic work relationship, I felt like I was crazy.<br/><br/>Anonymous "3" -- thanks for your perspective on British workplace toxicity. Ahhh...it's good to know that it's not just us Americans. <br/><br/>Seriously, you make a good point about how to deal with toxic behavior. If you can surround yourself with people who are positive and "above the fray" of toxic behavior, you'll be happier.<br/><br/>I find that being around positive, high-road people is the perfect antidote to toxic behavior. Like a nice hot shower! Ready to win, I’m so happy that this writing helped. Sometimes just seeing the craziness (of a toxic environment or toxic behavior) for what it is makes it easier to deal with. I know when I was sucked into a toxic work relationship, I felt like I was crazy.

Anonymous “3″ — thanks for your perspective on British workplace toxicity. Ahhh…it’s good to know that it’s not just us Americans.

Seriously, you make a good point about how to deal with toxic behavior. If you can surround yourself with people who are positive and “above the fray” of toxic behavior, you’ll be happier.

I find that being around positive, high-road people is the perfect antidote to toxic behavior. Like a nice hot shower!

]]> Comment on Toxic People by Anonymous http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-39 Anonymous Wed, 21 Jan 2009 08:01:00 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-39 Regarding the assumption that toxic people thrive more in the claustraphobic environment of an office, i don't think it's the office itself more the situation of any group of people being at or working at close quarters over periods of time.<br/> Having lived a rather unconventional lifestyle for most of my life, were periods of work were nothing more than a chance to accumulate enough money to travel abroad for long periods i have over the years on returning to this country noticed a huge amount of toxicity not just in the work place but in British society in general.<br/> I have never found it difficuilt to cut away people who play a toxic role in my life regardless of who they are. So in general i have lived a life with few constant negative influences around me, but, the periods when i return to the workplace in this country whether it be in an office or any manual job on a large site i can't help but notice the levels of negativity and toxicity are pretty extreme. When i come back from travelling i am happy and balanced and little bothers me or upsets me, because i have been free to do the things i love to do with other like minded people who are happy with themselves and their lives. But within a couple of months of being in an English workplace i can feel the life being drained out of me not by the work but by the people you work with. When you live a life where egotism,unnecessary competiveness and insecurity doesn't play a huge part in your thinking suddenly being around groups of people whose whole life appears to revolve around those things it's an experience i never look forward to. It never ceases to shock me the constant negativity,plotting, back stabbing, shit stirring and just general bad intentioned gossip and mischief making it's endemic in the British workplace. Of course not everyone is involved but it is certainly not just the odd toxic person some are extreme cases but the whole environment seems to breed that attitude. I think there are some that ordinarily are probably decent well balanced people but having to suffer the environment week in week out year in year out with the work place playing such a big part in their life it's probably only natural they become a part of the toxic behaviour in preference to being a constant victim of it. Regarding the assumption that toxic people thrive more in the claustraphobic environment of an office, i don’t think it’s the office itself more the situation of any group of people being at or working at close quarters over periods of time.
Having lived a rather unconventional lifestyle for most of my life, were periods of work were nothing more than a chance to accumulate enough money to travel abroad for long periods i have over the years on returning to this country noticed a huge amount of toxicity not just in the work place but in British society in general.
I have never found it difficuilt to cut away people who play a toxic role in my life regardless of who they are. So in general i have lived a life with few constant negative influences around me, but, the periods when i return to the workplace in this country whether it be in an office or any manual job on a large site i can’t help but notice the levels of negativity and toxicity are pretty extreme. When i come back from travelling i am happy and balanced and little bothers me or upsets me, because i have been free to do the things i love to do with other like minded people who are happy with themselves and their lives. But within a couple of months of being in an English workplace i can feel the life being drained out of me not by the work but by the people you work with. When you live a life where egotism,unnecessary competiveness and insecurity doesn’t play a huge part in your thinking suddenly being around groups of people whose whole life appears to revolve around those things it’s an experience i never look forward to. It never ceases to shock me the constant negativity,plotting, back stabbing, shit stirring and just general bad intentioned gossip and mischief making it’s endemic in the British workplace. Of course not everyone is involved but it is certainly not just the odd toxic person some are extreme cases but the whole environment seems to breed that attitude. I think there are some that ordinarily are probably decent well balanced people but having to suffer the environment week in week out year in year out with the work place playing such a big part in their life it’s probably only natural they become a part of the toxic behaviour in preference to being a constant victim of it.

]]> Comment on Is it OK to Cry at Work? by krennie004 http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/04/26/is-it-ok-to-cry-at-work/#comment-38 krennie004 Thu, 09 Oct 2008 02:10:00 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/04/26/is-it-ok-to-cry-at-work/#comment-38 I SOOO relate to this story!!! I'm in the EXACT same boat as Liza. No matter WHAT I do, when I get angry, frustrated (especially), sad (of course), stage-frightened etc, I immediately burst out into tears! I'm 22, and I've tried my whole life to control it, but it's just not possible. I've gotten over the stage-fright a bit, but to do so I have to tell myself for at least 1 day ahead of time, over and over again, like a chant, that "I can do this".<br/><br/>I recently broke down crying in front of my new boss (twice in a span of a week or two) during performance reviews as well. And, she would tell me I was doing a good job, but at the same time, she makes me feel like I'm 2 foot tall, and 2 years old making me feel like I can't do anything right (hence the tears). I will admit, BOTH times, she made me take a break after I started crying, and I was COMPLETELY humiliated.<br/><br/>I'm glad to know I'm not the only one! I SOOO relate to this story!!! I’m in the EXACT same boat as Liza. No matter WHAT I do, when I get angry, frustrated (especially), sad (of course), stage-frightened etc, I immediately burst out into tears! I’m 22, and I’ve tried my whole life to control it, but it’s just not possible. I’ve gotten over the stage-fright a bit, but to do so I have to tell myself for at least 1 day ahead of time, over and over again, like a chant, that “I can do this”.

I recently broke down crying in front of my new boss (twice in a span of a week or two) during performance reviews as well. And, she would tell me I was doing a good job, but at the same time, she makes me feel like I’m 2 foot tall, and 2 years old making me feel like I can’t do anything right (hence the tears). I will admit, BOTH times, she made me take a break after I started crying, and I was COMPLETELY humiliated.

I’m glad to know I’m not the only one!

]]> Comment on Toxic People by Ready to win http://theloyaltygroup.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-37 Ready to win Wed, 03 Sep 2008 02:33:00 +0000 http://loyaltygroup.marketspacecom.com/2007/05/13/toxic-people/#comment-37 I found a lot of encouragement from your writing Phyllis, so thank you kindly. <br/><br/>I have worked in a toxic office for 2 years while finishing my degree. Two particular older women are openly toxic toward me, and clients, and their own friends by judging and criticising. Now I have my own office I am insulated from it, but I see them doing the same to the another worker. <br/><br/>I have only just teamed up with this other worker to share our pains. I have realised that I have been paranoid about 'letting people in' for the past 2 years! - we should have teamed up a lot earlier! <br/><br/>I am committed to stay at my job, as I have worked hard for it. Since I recognised they were 'toxic' last year, I unplugged. This leaves me out of the social loop at work, but this is a neccesary sacrifice, as every conversation with these toxic women is dangerous. <br/><br/>Now that I've decided how to deal with them, these 2 women have no chance of bringing me down. And since I have unplugged, they have tried to be 'nicer' but I wont budge.<br/><br/>I just hope my co-worker friend does not leave, as it is important to have some support.<br/><br/>Ready to win I found a lot of encouragement from your writing Phyllis, so thank you kindly.

I have worked in a toxic office for 2 years while finishing my degree. Two particular older women are openly toxic toward me, and clients, and their own friends by judging and criticising. Now I have my own office I am insulated from it, but I see them doing the same to the another worker.

I have only just teamed up with this other worker to share our pains. I have realised that I have been paranoid about ‘letting people in’ for the past 2 years! – we should have teamed up a lot earlier!

I am committed to stay at my job, as I have worked hard for it. Since I recognised they were ‘toxic’ last year, I unplugged. This leaves me out of the social loop at work, but this is a neccesary sacrifice, as every conversation with these toxic women is dangerous.

Now that I’ve decided how to deal with them, these 2 women have no chance of bringing me down. And since I have unplugged, they have tried to be ‘nicer’ but I wont budge.

I just hope my co-worker friend does not leave, as it is important to have some support.

Ready to win

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